Shusei, too, snagged the blanket from his bed and made his way outside, where he folded down to sit beside Hotsuma without a word. He took a moment to toss the blanket out, over both their legs, then settled down shoulder to shoulder beside his partner.
Granted, they weren't married in this life and he himself was always quick to point out to others that who he's been then wasn't the same as who he was now - and not because he was male in this life as opposed to Hotsuma's wife in the last. He was different because in this life... he was fundamentally incomplete and he knew that.
Just as he knew he'd have to admit that, now, because while Hotsuma was his light and his reason for living, Shusei just...
He couldn't do it anymore.
He couldn't be the reason that guilt and recrimination etched pain into those brilliant startdust eyes anymore. It was killing him more and more each day to be the one hurting the only person in his world that shone so blindingly. Even so, even knowing what he'd have to say now, he still found himself watching his partner's profile as he settled into place. All the tension, all the anger and confusion, was like a weight pressing in on Hotsuma and Shusei found himself wanting to curse these new gods with all of his anger for doing this to him.
All he did do, however, was lean forward and brush his lips in a featherlight caress over the bandages encircling the other's neck in silent apology before he leaned back against the tree again.
"Alright, Hotsuma. Where... how do you want to start? You can finish yelling at me if you need - just not in your usual dulcet tones. I don't think these cabins are exactly thick-walled."
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Granted, they weren't married in this life and he himself was always quick to point out to others that who he's been then wasn't the same as who he was now - and not because he was male in this life as opposed to Hotsuma's wife in the last. He was different because in this life... he was fundamentally incomplete and he knew that.
Just as he knew he'd have to admit that, now, because while Hotsuma was his light and his reason for living, Shusei just...
He couldn't do it anymore.
He couldn't be the reason that guilt and recrimination etched pain into those brilliant startdust eyes anymore. It was killing him more and more each day to be the one hurting the only person in his world that shone so blindingly. Even so, even knowing what he'd have to say now, he still found himself watching his partner's profile as he settled into place. All the tension, all the anger and confusion, was like a weight pressing in on Hotsuma and Shusei found himself wanting to curse these new gods with all of his anger for doing this to him.
All he did do, however, was lean forward and brush his lips in a featherlight caress over the bandages encircling the other's neck in silent apology before he leaned back against the tree again.
"Alright, Hotsuma. Where... how do you want to start? You can finish yelling at me if you need - just not in your usual dulcet tones. I don't think these cabins are exactly thick-walled."